Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The SAT Revisited

I don't remember what they're called on the SAT, but those word analogies where banana is to yellow, as orange is to orange, axcept harder and with words like verisimilitude.
Prison:Cigarettes as Work:Donuts
I bought myself $6 worth of donut hole goodwill today. Fifty
Munchkins for $5.99 and the undying love of the Order Entry group. I consider
it an investment in my mental health.

Swaddle:Sleep as Sleep:Sex*
On the last post Julie asked how weaning Bobo off the swaddle was going. Well, there's nothing I like to do more than answer reader questions...and it's pretty easy to do since I only have two readers, one of whom I alienated, so here you go Julie: If it ain't broke don't fix it. I have decided that when/if it becomes a problem, I will deal with it then. Bobo is not about to outgrow his awesome (seriously love them) swaddling blankets. He doesn't fight the swaddle. He likes it. He smiles for it. I guess I just thought that you were supposed to stop. And you are. Eventually. But I still like covers (even in the summer). So, now if he's really asleep, I'll put him in his crib with his swaddling blankie but not in it. It might someday become his lovey this was. And he's taken two naps of 2+ hours unswaddled. So, I think, someday, we'll make the transition. And heck, it might get too warm this summer for swaddling, so we might quit then (or we'll move into a meat locker...one of those two things). *(the answer is, you can't have the second if you're not getting the first)

Bobo is 20 lbs and 28 or 29" long. We use Size Large Kiddopatamus SwaddleMe blankets. We have two in microfleece and two in a t-shirt weight cotton. They are $10-$12 apiece. I bought them all new. And you know how thrifty I am, so I must think these are the bomb to spend over $40 on them. We had one Miracle Blanket which was fine, until Bobo was about 10 weeks old and too long for it. So, for as much as that cost (and it was a gift), it was so not worth it. I also had a SwaddleMe in polarfleece size small which we used alternately with the Miracle Blanket (whichever was in the wash, you know).

Ear Infections:Sleep as Tornadoes:Trailer Parks
I thought I might throw in the towel and start co-sleeping, but then we discovered that Chuckles had an ear infection and he started sleeping again. So, Bobo remains in his crib in a separate room where he has slept every night since coming home from the hospital. Babies are all noisy and grunty in their sleep so I do not want them in my room where I try to get precious sleep. If they sigh, I'll hear them, so no worries.

My Finger:Red as Ocean:Blue
Lisa the Cat has a death wish. She threw up on me at 1:17 am the other morning. Or is that considered night. Anyway. This necessitated that I stagger around the house finding cleaning products and whatnot. I ended up closing my pinky finger in the bathroom cabinet. I exclaimed with an audible M-Effer and developed a heck of a blood blister. So, here I am typing nine-fingered. For you. Because I care.

Bobo:Lizards as My Legs:Fluffy Furry Animals
Bobo got booted from daycare one day not that long ago. Suspected ringworm. Turns out, he has eczema. In the shape of circles. I bought a new cream (Aveeno with the blue cap for dry skin even that caused by eczema) and with thrice daily applications, even his disgusting bloody circle of shame is clearing up. He had this...THING on his neck the size of two quarters that was just raw, like meat. And that is recovering with this cream. I like this cream. This nine-dollar cream. It's good. It's clearing up random spots on his face and legs. Apparently this kid was a little scaly.

Bobo's Poop:Marbles as Baby Chuckles's Poop:Acid Water
Bobo started solids and his poop turned to marbles, so I have taken him off of cereal with formula. I don't know which of those two things was causing the operational slow-down, but one of them was. Since stopping, his poop is still only weekly but it's better. Less screamy, if you know what I mean. So, I guess I can't wean until it's milk time since he can't have formula (or at least not Nestle Good Start, which is the formula we used with Chuckles who had milk protein issues).

Breastfeeding:Bliss as Pumping:Buzzkill
I like breastfeeding well enough, but I hate pumping. So, the thought of needing to keep this up is a little depressing. When I was doing it because I wanted to, that was one thing. But the obligation is a little rougher. Of course, it's not all about me. It's about not wanting Bobo to scream. At me. So, there's that motivation. I'm no where near ready to give it up yet, so that's good, but I've noticed my pumping volume is tapering off a little and I'm starting to dip into my (completely ample) freezer stash. Such is life. I'm sure I could try a different brand or a soy formula or something, but I was hoping not to have to do that, since I get the Good Start for free included with my day care. Maybe I'll take their formula and sell it and buy enfamil or something. Or I'll just keep on keeping on and nursing. I do like being able to eat whatever I want and stay the same weight.

I think I'd like to learn to write haiku and put the next post in that format since this analogy stuff is such a laugh riot. I also have thoughts on Iran's stolen elections, David Letterman's objectification of women, the liberal media, conservatives with no fiscal sensibility, General Motors, my love of the corvette, my desire to buy a boat, the political firing of the Inspector General, political favoritism in college admissions, Mike Pence, earmarks, the end of the era of The Dollar, the crappy way Newsweek reinvented itself with my subscription money, the digital TV conversion (and what is on the TV now with and without a convertor box), the lawsuit I have with the place that nearly killed Chuckles, Chuckles's first school field trip on the big yellow bus, and much more. But it will have to wait for another day. I'm beat and off to bed.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

How did it get to be June already?

First off...I just got an email from my aunt. She and my uncle are going on a cruise to Greece on some brand new cruise ship....without their kids. For 12 days in September. And here is my answer to her: "I hope you enjoy my honeymoon." A billion years ago when Mr. Long-Suffering and I were getting married, we planned on cruising the Greek Isles, but there was a nationwide air-traffic stop as we were married in Sept. 2001. So, we went to Chicago and did dinner and a show every night. We re-planned the cruise for our six-month anniversary but Bali bombings. For our one-year, we went to Vegas (but Venice and New York and Paris all in one!). And so, here we are 8 years later, and we have yet to take our honeymoon.

Mimi and Papa have decided to sell their house and get something in a single story so they can stop doing stairs. Personally, I think my mother and step-father are nuts to sell a house right now when there is no compelling reason to do so. It seems like a fine time to buy a house, not-so-much for the selling. But they both think it will be no problem because it's summer and they have a pool.
We just refinanced and had a professional apprasial and found out our house is worth what we paid for it 6 years ago. Since then, we've done windows, roof, bathroom, insulation, landscaping, waterproofing, updating, etc. And we've made a grand total of zero dollars on the proposition. At least we enjoy living here.

I accidentally turned one of the Medela bottles that go with my Pump-in-Style inside-out rendering it useless. I could tell you how I did it, but I rather like leaving you with the mystery.

I have an all-day work meeting tomorrow off-site. There is a dedicated lactation room where I am going. And I am pretty excited about it. I know. They last time I had an off-site meeting, I wound up sitting on the floor of the ladies' room pumping in a stall so I could be near the only exposed electrical outlet. A decidated room sounds like it might have a fridge. And a chair! I'll let you know what I find out.

Bobo has gone from being a happy sleeper monkey to being a happy non-sleeper monkey. I am not thrilled with the change. Actually, he sleeps. He's more of a wake up every couple of hours and have you come in just to show me you're still there kind of monkey. Not sure what kind of monkey that is. A gibbon, maybe.
There are new rules at our house. Mr. Long-Suffering is in charge of all wake-ups before 2 am (unless I magically determine that Bobo is actually hungry, magically/arbitrarily, whatever). Then, at the next wake up, I feed him. Then, Mr. Long-Suffering is on again until it has been at least 3 hours since the feeding. So, I am up at 2 and 5:15 for 20 minutes each time (or 1 am and 4:30). Mr. Long-Suffering is up for 30 seconds at 11, 11:45, 12:58, 1:19, 3:17, and 5:42 (at which point he stays up). I'm not sure who has it worse. Mr. Long-Suffering is up for 3 minutes over night and I am up for about an hour, but he has to get out of bed more, but I have to push him out because he sleeps through the wake-ups. It only takes a second to get happy monkey back to sleep, but ignoring him doesn't work. He doesn't even open his eyes, he just needs to know you're there. Very odd. I hope he grows out of it.
I am learning to do side-lying nursing. I think it could change my life. Am also considering co-sleeping, and if you know me, you realize the level of desperation I'm experiencing. It's funny though. I know I was MUCH more deperate by the time Chuckles was this age. I never split night-time duty with the Mr. I never ever co-slept. I rarely napped. Chuckles woke a lot more. And here I am considering much more drastic measures than I had with Chcukles. Because I don't want to become that crazy person I was last time. I'm starting to think I might have had Post-Partum Depression after Chuckles. It's not uncommon. I had about eleventy risk factors (history of periodic/episodic depression, sleeplessness, emergency c-section with a difficult recovery, infertility, high expectations about maternal role, little support). I'm just doing so much better this time around even though things are more hectic (with a second kid around to take care of). I'm proud of myself for realizing that this can't keep up and getting a plan in place long before I'm crying hyserically all the time because I am so so very tired.

I have mentioned my Pro-Choice stand on many occasions. I love babies. I trust women to make the best decisions they possibly can in crappy circumstances. I've been blogging birth control and abortion since long before that was cool. So, I reiterate, get your laws out of my hoo-ha.

As far as I know, Indiana has no "right to breastfeed" laws, but I've been out feeding my baby in public like a mad-woman because I almost feel like I want someone to challenge me. I will make a federal case of it. I'm quite discreet most of the time. My in-laws are funny. They still don't "get" it. My FIL asked me if we were bringing a diaper bag out to dinner one night. I replied that it was in the car. He asked if we had a bottle. I smiled and said, "No, we have me." And I did feed smiler monkey at the table in the restaurant using my Boppy and my cool hooter hider.

I think they don't get it because my SIL who has kids roughly the ages of my kids said she couldn't breastfeed because she never got a full supply. I knew she did some supplementing with formula in the early days but when talking to her, she had no idea that this would hinder her milk coming in. She thought she had to feed the baby until her milk came in. Uhhh, no, that is not how supply and demand works. Ha ha. The sad thing is no one ever told her until it was too late. And she thought the marathon feeding sessions of every hour all evening meant she didn't have enough milk or good enough milk, etc. No one mentioned that this was the baby's way of putting in his order for more milk, please, and also hold me close and keep me safe and warm. Man, am I glad I read the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It was a little over-the-top for me, but the mechanics/science was good.

I just finished reading the book The Girls Who Went Away about young women who surrended children for adoption in the years before Roe v Wade. Poignant. The women didn't want to do it. Sometimes, the boys were even willing to marry the girls, but the parents said no. Horrible. In one case, I would say it was actually kidnapping. And the lies the people told about he absences and the lengths to which people went to keep the secret. It wasn't all girls going upstate to visit a sick aunt. One family told everyone their daughter spent the summer in Florida working as a cabana waitress and sent her to the maternity home with a tanning lamp so that when she came back, she'd look like she'd been in Florida. So many of the schools turned the girls out on rumor of pregnancy. The girls didn't know what was happening. There was no knowledge of the body. It was horrible. And the secret was so shameful. It ruined the girls' lives, so often. An excellent book. Truly excellent. Makes me support comprehensive sex education that much more.

Speaking of birth control....I mentioned I got the Mirena and have bled every day since. Once I put it out on the internet, I went 3 days without bleeding. Only to have it start up again with a vengeance. I bought 130 panty liners a while back and they are all gone. I need another gross of them, I guess. I was supposed to be enjoying my lactational ammennorhea, but here I am.

My new car is still awesome. If GM put as much engineering, thought, attention to detail, and quality into every car they put on the road, they would not be in bankruptcy. My car is awesome. My car also no longer has satellite radio after today, and that it a shame. RIP- Hair Nation siriusXM 46. I think I should be in charge of dismantling and rejiggering GM. I like cars. A lot. I am contemplating buying a '64 corvette (red, convertible) right now. A guy at work is selling, and I would love it. Love. I like horsepower and things that go vroom. I know drivetrains, chassis, trannies, direct injection, turbo-diesel, rack-and-pinion, stability control, air bags, power assist, CVT, AWD, ABS, quiet steel dashboards, two part paint systems, etc. I could be better than that 31-year old who has never been inside an auto plant. I've never been in an auto assembly plant, but I've been in components plants and an off-highway construction vehicle aseembly plant. That is close enough for gorvernmnet work, I'd say.