Monday, May 31, 2010

New Hair-Do

So, I got that bikini wax. And to whoever you people in the computer were who said it was great or it didn't hurt at all, I say, "Liars!" and also "Damn Liars". I went quite conservative (as in my nether parts did not go to South America), and still...OMFG!!!!! What is wrong with you people? Really? What is wrong with you? Are you like masochists?

The part where she waxed areas that are properly called my legs went fine. But anything that was a little, ahem, more private revolted against the wax. It was revolting. The bikini areas kind of, uhhhh, bled a little everywhere the hairs were yanked from their follicles. It's a good thing I took a couple of ibuprofen before I went.

I did that Saturday. It's late on Monday and I still cringe every time I go to the bathroom and my undies are stuck to my body with the little bits of unsexy ooze coming from my newly smooth skin. This was probably one of the worst grooming incidents of my life (and I once waxed most of an eyebrow least it didn't bleed).

So, I told my new waxing friend (her name is Holli) as I was nearly crying that I really am not usually such a big baby because I did the whole natural childbirth thing and it wasn't that bad. Then, I started with my lamaze breathing.

She said that "where you are in the month can affect how much it hurts" and then she told me a story about getting waxed right before she had her daughter because people were going to be looking down there and so on. So, we started chatting (as women who are naked from the waist down often do) about how many kids we have and so on. And of course, she asked me about my c-sections as she ripped the hair from the scar.

Anyway, it turns out that Holli's first born was a 23-weeker and didn't make it. Having been faced with this line of conversation before, I think I said all the right things. I truly was sorry but I know she has probably made some kind of peace with it after 9 years and she certainly doesn't want my pity. So, I told her that I was sorry to hear it but very happy that she is able to talk about it now. She went on to have two children at full term (with cerclage and a take-it-easy approach during pregnancy, in case you were wondering how she did it).

In summation, bikini wax = bad idea jeans.

==Abrupt topic change==

Bobo is having the basic immunology panel done. He's getting a CBC, IgA, IgG, IgM, IgE, titers for diphteria and tetanus (to see whether he put up an immune response to his vaccines), environmental and food allergy panel, HIV test (we had to sign a special paper authorizing that), and one other thing I can't think of. All-in-all it works out to 9 tubes of blood. He's been poked 5 times so far and he's only given up 3 or 4 tubes of blood-total. That was Friday and Saturday. The lab is ordering a special blood draw kit for Tuesday. If anything comes back unusual, I am getting the referral to a pediatric specialist because I bet they'll have some better set up for blood tests on kids. I feel like they've done the right things (warmers to bring the veins to the surface, butterfly needle of tiny gauge, etc) but this lab can't (by their license) draw from leg or scalp veins which I think might be better/bigger. Bobo is my pin cushion.

Bobo was basically on house arrest/quarantine from May 19th to the 28th. On the 28th, I took him to Meijer (where I disinfected the cart with spray and wipes and we bought cupcakes for Chuckles's last day at day care), the doctor's office, and another lab. Saturday, we went to the outdoor plant store and the lab again. Sunday we visited with family and went to IHOP (where I disinfected the table and high chair). Today, Bobo has disgusting ear drainage indicating to me that he caught a cold somewhere. ((Sigh)) I'm waiting for the fever so I know what level of high alert I should be on. Right now, I am not on alert...just on fire watch. We'll see.

I turned in the FMLA paperwork to the doctor's office because Bobo needs to be home (obviously) since routine errands apparently are too much for him. He was doing really well. In fact, he's still doing pretty well. He's making more sounds that resemble words. He's added a word for bye, one for car, and my MIL thinks he said "Gecko" but I'm not so sure. He says "guh" but I think it means "dog". So, progress. Which is something we hadn't seen on the language front in a long time.

Tomorrow, Mr. Long-Suffering is taking Bobo for the blood draw with the special syringe kit. I'll let you know how it goes. I'll also let you know if my lady bidness heals up.

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